At the Intersection of Life and Work
Jocelyn L. Hollings is Clinical Division Manager of Nephrology in Stanford's Department of Medicine.
There is something sweet about the New Year tradition of reflecting on time passed and setting intentions for the months ahead. There was certainly no shortage of hilarious “New Year, New Me” mantras and memes to be found when folks could so easily connect their optimistic resolutions to a “20/20 vision” for the future
Anyone who projected substantial life shifts for themselves in the year 2020 certainly wasn’t wrong. No doubt we can all tell a tale or two about the change, challenges and triumphs experienced during that pivotal year. But this isn’t another story about the resilience forged during the global pandemic that upended life as we knew it. Instead, this is a story about intersections of Life>Work for a Black>Woman.
The Awakening
In late Spring of 2020, when many Americans were stirred to reckon with racial (in)justice, I experienced a relative awakening of my own; but not to the atrocities of police brutality, weaponized whiteness or other perils of American history and present-day society. My revelation came in the form of breached boundaries. Where once I could compartmentalize my personal life from my work experiences, the two versions of me first intersected when open dialogue on racial justice swept the Stanford campus via listening sessions and messages from our most senior leaders. This new work experience challenged a survival mechanism I hadn’t even realized was on autopilot -- the management of my identities. As the line between work and life continued to blur, I could no longer maintain my guarded, professional façade.
I laid aside my apprehensions about the earnestness of calls for change and stepped with cautious optimism toward bridging what I cared about personally to how I showed up professionally. By dropping the masking habit and making concerted efforts to express myself with less inhibition, I began to feel liberated and more effective in every area of my life. I came to understand that maintaining a hyperawareness of how others perceived me only served to divert my energy, dampen my talents, and whittle away at my overall wellbeing. Thankfully, I had the foresight to enlist support along the journey to the new, more whole, me and in the spirit of integrating my work/life resources, I tapped in to the Faculty Staff Help Center (FSHC) (shout out to Mary Foston-English for her culturally competent care!). I embraced greater vulnerability and authenticity and took delight in modeling the traits for my colleagues with the hope that both would take root as core leadership values in Stanford Medicine. I had no idea that a few short weeks later, my values and my trust in our organization would be tested.
Work and Life Collide
When my father was critically injured by a drunk driver in the Summer of 2020, I did all that I could to ensure he received the best care before he succumbed to his injuries. Before then, I had no idea I carried seeds of medical mistrust given the history of Black Americans being mistreated in the health care establishment. Having to help make care decisions while reconciling my fear of the field I work in support of was a bizarre experience, to say the least. But once again, when I let them, the blurred lines between my personal and professional life served to support me. It was FSHC sessions, encouragement from our Vice Chair, Cathy Garzio, to take the time needed to care for my family and myself, and cross-country infusions of calm support from my former chief, dear friend and proven #WIM ally, Dr. Glenn Chertow that helped me navigate the nightmare. I returned to work deeply comforted by the outpouring of care and assistance that I received from my colleagues and able to continue unpacking my experience as a black woman, health care professional and patient.
Professional Development is Personal and Productive
I love to learn; and in my pursuit of a dynamic and ever-increasing leadership aptitude, I have had the great fortune of working with several people who helped champion my career development and advancement. It was with the support of my division chief, Dr. Tara Chang (a powerful #StanfordWIM!) and aided by the curriculum of GSB’s Black Leaders Program that I continued to explore the intersections of my identity as a black woman and consider how it informs, or is influenced by, my work at Stanford. Through academic discourse and peer support, I was able to unravel deeply personal thoughts and feelings in a virtual room full of other black leaders (a unique occurrence in my 15 years with Stanford where I’m often the only one). It was such a remarkably enriching and healing experience that I hope to see DEI education extend beyond the bias and microaggression training produced for the masses to incorporate identity-specific development for other underrepresented leaders. With the realization of how incredibly powerful it is to allow people the space to fully be and genuinely express themselves, the concept of inclusion in the workplace took a new, more practical, form for me. I endeavor to see many more people freed from the burden of managing themselves against unspoken (maybe even imaginary) norms that do not fully support the wellness of people driving our tripartite mission.
In the meantime, I applaud the Stanford Department of Medicine (DoM) leadership for upholding a learning culture, and supporting personalized coaching resources to supplement engagements such as those offered in partnership with WellMD for clinicians or the BetterUp® coaching platform being piloted by the SoM (JEDI) team under the direction of Dr. Shaila Kotadia, an inspiring catalyst for culture change in Stanford Medicine along with her team of go-getters (shoutout to Miranda, Matt and Morgan for their bold leadership in the staff-focused DEI space!).
Restorative Spaces for our Clinicians
I very intentionally shared the resources and relationships I called upon in my times of need to help normalize seeking support. Women in Medicine Month is shared with Suicide Prevention Awareness Month and recent survey results gauging physician wellness have been heavy on my mind. The Stanford Nephrology community lost a treasured colleague and friend to suicide just a few months ago and when work and life intersected for those who knew Dr. Amul Jobalia, it was incredibly challenging for our faculty and trainees to carry-on in their roles as caretakers and healers when they themselves were under the heavy weight of grief. We sat together, cried together and broke bread together, but that was just the beginning of the grief journey. More care and connection are needed and for physicians, however unusual it may seem, sometimes the time and place for community care is in the same spaces they work to restore the health and wellness of patients. Let’s normalize that.
I imagine most people reading this are aware of the connections between chronic stress and physical manifestation or worsening of disorders in the body, like heart disease. Now, there’s no MD after my name, but I posit our metaphorical hearts need attention. Some of us have old wounds that haven’t healed or were hastily dressed in the rush to return to daily responsibilities. I hope that everyone will continue seeking balance in their personal and professional lives, make calls to get support, ask for clinical coverage, whatever is necessary to be well, be whole, be your best self for your loved ones, for your patients and for the Stanford community.
An Individual Call to Action
When questions like “what is Stanford doing to…?” pop up, I like to remind myself and others that there is no single, omniscient being on campus that will respond to the needs of our community. The institution is made up of individuals – each with the ability (and I dare say, responsibility) to influence change. We have the privilege of co-creating an organizational culture where faculty, staff and trainees are presented the same value of care and respect that clinicians aspire to deliver patients. Will you answer the call?
Takeaways for those in positions of influence/authority
- Continue (or increase!) investment in the wellbeing of individuals.
- Model and invite authenticity, vulnerability, empathy and self-compassion.
- Seek out underrepresented or overlooked talent in your unit and be it through mentorship, championing, or policy change, facilitate opportunities for their development, advancement and inclusion in spaces they might not otherwise access.
Takeaways for talent
- If you want to be valued for who you are, stop hiding! Take risks, connect and speak-up. No matter your role, you are a valuable member of this community.
- Seize any growth opportunity and prioritize it. Remember, development is productive -- it is not frivolous or indulgent.
- Own your career journey and seek support along the way.
“Now, there’s no MD after my name, but I posit our metaphorical hearts need attention. Some of us have old wounds that haven’t healed or were hastily dressed in the rush to return to daily responsibilities. I hope that everyone will continue seeking balance in their personal and professional lives, make calls to get support, ask for clinical coverage, whatever is necessary to be well, be whole, be your best self for your loved ones, for your patients and for the Stanford community."
